Category Archives: Tax Humor

Tax Humor – New Stress Relief Method

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Feeling stressed out before your audit? Relax and enjoy this new stress relief method…

Picture yourself near a stream.

Birds are softly chirping in the crisp cool mountain air.

Nothing can bother you here. No one knows this secret place.

You are in total seclusion from that place called “the world.”

The soothing sound of a gentle waterfall fills the air with a cascade of serenity.

The water is clear.

You can easily make out the face of the person whose head you’re holding under the water.

Look. It’s the IRS agent who caused you all this stress in the first place.

What a pleasant surprise. You let them up…just for a quick breath…then ploop!…back under they go…

You allow yourself as many deep breaths as you want.

You are relaxed and at peace.

Thanks to Robert E. McKenzie for sharing this tax time humor!

IRS Terror Tale of the Month – Cheating IRS and Employees

Owner of S&S Drywall, Stephen Gregory Nagy thought he was being quite inventive when he came up with his scheme to not only cheat the IRS but also his employees back in 2010. After the IRS assessed his company, they determined that Nagy owed more than $480,000 in unpaid federal employment taxes, penalties, and interests, Nagy came up with a plan that he would hire several undocumented workers and pay them a small portion of the prevailing wage. He also demanded that those same workers pay him a large portion of cash in return—which went unreported.

From there the business owner forced his employees (via intimidation and threats) to file for unemployment benefits—even though they continued to work for him. He gave them cash to make up for the difference in salary, which was not reported—nor were the federal income taxes, social security, or Medicare taxes paid. In essence, the State of Oregon paid part of the employees’ salaries.

In order to hide the cash, Nagy created shell companies in his sister’s name—transferring business and personal assets. Considering the fact that Nagy was already known by the IRS, it’s mind boggling how he thought he wouldn’t get caught! Of course, he did, in September of 2014, when he was sentenced to 19 months in a federal prison and ordered to pay more than $480,000 in restitution.

His former employees now have no social security benefits or Medicare. Read more in my February eNewsletter and be sure to subscribe to receive “IRS Terror Tale of the Month” tales and tax resolution business and marketing tips!

 

Tax Season Humor for Tax Pros

CPAs, attorneys and EAs all need a little comic relief to get through the tax season. Here are a few of my favorite funny tax quotes. On a serious note, the sooner you add tax resolution to your practice, the sooner you don’t have to be codependent on tax season (and endure the stress of it).  Solving tax problems is a year round business that can boost your business.

“Tax law is a funny thing. I think it fair to say that most CPAs know something about the federal income tax; many if not most lawyers do not.” ~ Bernard Wolfman

A CPA goes into a pet shop to buy a parrot. The shopkeeper shows him three identical parrots on a perch and says, “The parrot on the left costs $500.” “Why does that parrot cost so much?” asks the CPA. “Well”, replies the owner, “it knows how to do complex audits.” “How much does the middle parrot cost?” asks the CPA. “That one costs $1,000 because it can do everything the first one can do plus it knows how to prepare financial forecasts.” The startled CPA asks about the third parrot, to be told it costs $4,000. Needless to say, this begs the question, what can it do? To which the owner replies, “To be honest, I have never seen him do a darn thing, but the other two call him Senior Partner.”

“I would suggest the taxation of all property equally whether church or corporation, exempting only the last resting place of the dead and possibly, with proper restrictions, church edifices.”  ~ Ulysses S. Grant

Tax quotes courtesy of: Robert E. McKenzie, Esq. Attorney at Law

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Tax Humor Quotes for Tax Time

As many of us get immersed in tax season, I feel it is helpful to share some comic relief.  Here are some of my favorite tax quotes and tax humor – at Uncle Sam’s expense, naturally.

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Here, late night comedians wade into:

“Nobody likes taxes, but they’ve been around forever. Taxes date back all the way back to the year one, when baby Jesus was visited by two wise men and an IRS agent, who demanded half the family’s frankincense.” –Jimmy Kimmel

“The U.S. Senate is considering a bill that would tax Botox. When Botox users heard this, they were horrified. Well, I think they were horrified. It’s difficult to tell.” –Craig Ferguson

(Courtesy of Bob McKenzie Attorney at Law)

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